How to Talk to Children About Divorce: A Psychologist’s Advice

Why This Is So Important

Divorce is a crisis not only for a couple, but also for a child.
Yet a child’s main resource is the parent who is able to remain stable and caring.

Children are highly sensitive to the emotional state of adults and reflect it. That’s why taking care of yourself and maintaining your own balance directly helps your child get through the changes more easily.

Key Rules for the Conversation

1. Speak Calmly and Confidently
   • It’s important for the child to see that you are in control of the situation.
2. Use Simple Words
   • Avoid details about conflicts. It’s enough to say: “We decided to live separately, but we both remain your parents.”
3. Emphasize Love and Stability
   • Children often think: “If mom and dad separated, maybe they can stop loving me too.”
     It’s crucial to repeat many times: “We will always love you, even if we live apart.”
4. Answer Their Questions
   • Even the hard ones — like where they will live or with whom they’ll spend holidays. Honest answers reduce anxiety.

What Can Help a Child

• Maintaining a familiar daily routine
• Knowing that the parent is stable and present
• Having the opportunity to openly express feelings

Why Working on Yourself Matters

If you notice your child is struggling, start with yourself: your inner balance is what they will lean on.
By working with a psychologist, a parent learns to cope with their own stress and anxiety — so they can give the child a sense of safety.

👉 If your child shows serious changes (withdrawal, constant tantrums, declining performance at school), consider also consulting a child psychologist.

How Consultation Can Help

In sessions, we discuss how to support your child while preserving your own resources.
Usually, several consultations are enough to help you feel more confident and calm.